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"This summer, get ready for the movie that’s being praised by critics.
When a young woman (forcibly) decides to get engaged, she goes on one of the hottest, wildest bachelorette parties of the century. And what happens in Nazareth, stays in Nazareth. But when a pregnancy test shows she got more than she bargained for, one little lie will change everything!
“…wha— wait…huh…?” -The RollingStones
Follow them on a road through hardships, betrayal, love and realization in this feel good movie. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll gest at the irony of a cheating fiancé being synonymous with “virgin,” in modern society.
“If a evil and morbid executive with a side of dementia was looking to create the demon child of cinema, this film is the one…” -IGN
Starring Kim Kardashian as Mary, Nicholas Cage as Joseph, Chevy Chase, Clint Eastwood and the zombie of Bernie Mac as the three wise men, and Tanning Chatam as Jesus Christ himself.
“Why was this movie made?” -The Washington Post
Wonder at the gulability of our ancestors. Discover doubt after walking out the theater, only seven minutes into the film. And marvel at how Jesus Christ, the only son of God, is technically a bastard.
“Father, why have thou forsaken me?!” “She said she was on the pill.”
Pre-order now and get half off the DVD when released. With extra bonus features and an alternate ending so shocking, so twisted, you’ll constantly ask yourself “Did that Angel just date rape the Virgin Mary?”
And if that wasn’t disturbing enough, SHE WAS ONLY TWELVE!
Virgin of the Mary.
This summer! Be there or be christened!(But if you’re late makeup a very convincing lie…)
Directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Produced by Ryan Seacrest, written by Dennis Rodman, with new music by Justin Bieber and the Wu Tang Clan
All rights reserved to Disney"